时间：2010-09-30 13:24:40 来源：本报报道 作者：记者
（吉隆坡30日讯）本月6日马新社（Bernama）摘录了马大历史系教授邱家金表示质疑或提问有关联邦宪法第153条文（有关土著特权）的大马各族人民都是历史的文盲或不了解宪法的言论。根据邱家金的说法，如今的社会人士都是历史文盲，因为他们不了解以下几项史实：
1. 马来人特权早在1948年2月1日，当马来亚联合邦被成立的时候就已经被定下来了。
2. 马来人特权是根据自1895就存在于马来亚的政府机制所定的，当时的9个州政府被沿用至今。
3. 在1957年联邦宪法中的马来人特权是延续1948年所定下的马来人地位而设。
4. 当时的非马来人都同意把马来人特权加入联邦宪法里。
来自政策倡议中心（CPI）的加耶纳（Jayanath Appudurai）表示马来人特权的确是在1948年被纳入马来亚联合邦协议里的，因为当时的英国是负责照顾马来人的特别地位以及其他种族的权益的。至于英国政府沿用自1895年就存在的马来亚州政府机制，加耶纳认为我们也应该记得英国政府似乎忽略了这项共识，尤其是在1946年欲成立马来亚联邦（Malayan Union）的时候。
“英国政府是故意忘记了这一点？还是他们比较注重在这个即将独立的国家建立一致的公民制度？不管当时的原因是什么，马来亚联邦并没有把这个所谓自1895年就存在的传统纳入计划里。但是，英国政府最后被逼就范，因为受到了来自马来人方面的大力反抗。”也是“我是马来西亚之子”（Saya Anak Bangsa Malaysia）成员加耶纳这样表示。
加耶纳表示，对于其他种族答应把马来人特权列入联邦宪法的部份，邱家金并没有给予全面的解释。当时的共识并不是那么轻易就达到的，我们必须了解当时的谈判过程。从1956年至1957年之间，巫统、马华和国大党为了准备联盟的备忘录而曾经就“马来人特权”的课题辩论。
“虽然最终的共识是这一项条文必须被纳入，但是当时的联盟成员党并不认为这是永久的条文，相反地他们认为这项条文应该维持一段时间而已。为了不让其他激进组织继续反对，联盟领袖最终并没有把马来人特权的期限列入他们的备忘录。无论如何，当联盟向里德制宪委员会（Suruhanjaya Reid）呈现他们的备忘录时，阿都拉萨曾经建议在独立后的15年重新检讨马来人特权的条文。因此，里德报告书也纳入了这项建议。”
加耶纳表示，当里德报告书于1957年2月21日面世后，得到了来自不同种族人民的不同反应。一些马来人群体不同意15年期限的设定，而其他种族则表示担心这样的条文将会导致这个国家出现两种公民。最后，在各方面的压力下，统治者决定把15年的期限抽出，并且把重新检讨马来人特权条文的权力交给了最高元首。因此，各族代表一直同意马来人特权的说法在历史的角度是不准确的。
加耶纳质疑，邱家金把人民形容为历史文盲，但这是不是阻止人民继续讨论的好借口呢？比起50年代的社会，今天的我们更成熟以及更有能力去讨论土著固打制。也许现在是时候让我们开始以理性的态度来讨论如何公平地实行联邦宪法第153条文了。
Thursday, September 30, 2010
Wednesday, September 29, 2010
Wednesday, September 22, 2010
Thursday, June 10, 2010
教总与教师渐行渐远
作者／郑美芬 Jun 08, 2010 04:36:20 pm
【郑美芬】教总的宗旨为：一、联络马来西亚各地华校教师感情，谋求教师福利及发扬中华文化； 二、研究及促进教育； 三、争取华文教育以至华裔国民的平等地位。
教总为了配合该会与6月8日召开的会员代表大会，教总特别整理多份数据，其中包括2010年各源流小学统计数据（学生人数、学校人数、男女教师比例、微型学校及学前班等数据），《南洋商报》、《当今大马》、《独立新闻在线》均有刊载。
另外，教总也发表了关于《华小师资培训课程问题面面观》的文告，提及了教总一直通过各种管道鼓励华裔子弟加入教师行列，并为申请者提供种种的资讯和支援。同时，教总也谴责当局擅自把华小华文组申请者调到国小华文组及中文系毕业生不被录取参加大学毕业生师范课程（KPLI）的面试等问题。因此，教总提出了几项建议，希望能解决华小师资短缺的问题，以免打击这些老师要为教育贡献力量的热诚与理想。
教总难以让同道苟同
无论如何，笔者看了有关文告及数据等发现教总依然十年如一日，文告及呼吁毫无新意，更没为身在华小受苦得的教师申冤，显示教总已经与教师渐行渐远，难以让同道苟同。教总必须谨记教总成立的第一个宗旨为谋求教师的福利，这包括了为教师们争取最好的待遇、给予教师们鼓励、支持教师们为了家庭申请调职、维护教师们的尊严等等。教总并不能只是专注在广招大家加入教育界前的工作而已，反之教总更应该继续帮助在华小面对问题的教育工作者。
很多在籍华小教师在面对问题时，从不会想到教总，而另寻其他管道如教专（NUTP）或其他政党，因为教总在维护在籍教师的权利及权益时往往令人大失所望。这一次，闹得热烘烘的教师周六回校服务的课题，教专就站着教师的立场，劝教师向教专投诉，对付校方。可是，教总主席王超群却不是站在教师的立场，反指出教师们并非每个星期六都需要回校办活动，并说什么家长与教师在星期六见面较方便，显示教总没有坚持教师们休息的权利，不适合再成为全国华小教师的代表。
华小校方刁难教师
教育是良心工作，不是纸张工作，可是教师却把时间浪费在纸张工作，写了一大堆的数据及报告后，却已经身心疲累。教师没有特定的工作时间，挤出应该与家人相聚的时间准备教学后，教师们的假期还要被剥削去参与课程、露营、带队比赛或回到学校补习。
我们华小不只面对教育部招生过程欠缺透明的问题，更不明白华小教师不能被派到自己所要的地方执教，我们华小不像国小，我们处处都缺教师。可是，华小教师就被从北派到南或从南派到北，教育部就是不让华小教师回去，直接打击教师对教育的热诚。奈何，华小校方很少体谅教师，在申请调职时大多不支持，甚至刁难教师；与国小校方支持教师调职相比，华小校方就显得没有协助同道的精神。
教总的领导人是校长
笔者无意抨击教总领导人，但是从教总的常务理事名单中，我们可以知道教总的领导人大部分都是华小的校长。华小的校长在学校是最高领导人，通常都是发下指令让教师执行任务，虽然大家同是公务员，但是校长是上司，教师是下属，所以他们职务立场是对立的。
因此，校长根本不可能维护教师们的权利及权益，相反的还可能压迫及剥削教师的待遇。冰山一角，威南爆发校长体罚教师丑闻后，教总没有放过任何文告，显示出教总必须严禁校长成为理事，以还教总能维护全国华小教师的公信力，毕竟校长们已经有了华小教师职工会的组织平台。
众所周知，以往一些校长在学校买卖作业簿或学校用具等滥权舞弊事件，事情被揭发后只调往其他学校继续做校长的惩罚行动，不止不能阻吓校长，甚至涉嫌包庇他们。很多校长发现惩罚微不足道后，便越来越大胆进行滥权舞弊事件，以致牵涉的校长越来越多，让杏坛蒙羞。教总非但没有监督底下理事或会员，反而默许校长们在买卖作业及收取电脑费时取得回扣，以职权换取额外收入是为贪污，教总为帮凶。
教总应是教师组织
笔者赞扬教总在政策上作出争取，要求政府给予华文小学公平的待遇，同时也长期主办各项华文小学和幼教教师在职培训课程和工作坊。教总也积极推展教育改革的工作，以带领华文教育迎向资讯时代和知识经济时代的需求。这当中，所进行的工作包括主办父母教育课程、巡回教育讲座和研讨会及出 版相关的刊物。
无论如何，教总号称是全马各地区华校教师公会以及州级华校教师公会联合会组成的教师组织，可是发布的统计数据显示教总其实是代表华小的组织而已。身为教师组织，教总理应收集及整理各源流学校教师的级别及薪金（大学资格及非大学资格）以让更多的华小教师能够修读大学文凭或硕士文凭，取得升级及加薪。教总更应该收集申请调职多年都不成功的教师资料，反映予教育部，让华小教师能够回到家乡。此外，着手处理会员们权利及权益之争更是教总的责任。
教总成变相校长职工会
2010年6月8日的教总会员代表大会如果依旧讨论华教的旧课题，实际上并不能为华教带来什么巨大的改变，毕竟这种课题已讨论多次而毫无效果，政府的政策依然故我。在捍卫华教的同时，教总在这次的会员代表大会更应该改革，动议修改章程，拒绝校长成为理事，好让普通的教师们能够拿下责任，成为真正的教师组织。
为了彰显校长们都有维护华教及教育工作者的理想，校长们应该避嫌地离开有利益冲突的理事层，退位让贤。没有改革的教总是另一个校长职工会，这将与教师们渐行渐远，失去其代表性。如果教总一意孤行，笔者大胆建议全国华小教师开始组成的州、区域或县级“华校教师职工会”，最后成立“全国华小教师职工会”以继续争取华小在籍教师的权利及权益。
【郑美芬】教总的宗旨为：一、联络马来西亚各地华校教师感情，谋求教师福利及发扬中华文化； 二、研究及促进教育； 三、争取华文教育以至华裔国民的平等地位。
教总为了配合该会与6月8日召开的会员代表大会，教总特别整理多份数据，其中包括2010年各源流小学统计数据（学生人数、学校人数、男女教师比例、微型学校及学前班等数据），《南洋商报》、《当今大马》、《独立新闻在线》均有刊载。
另外，教总也发表了关于《华小师资培训课程问题面面观》的文告，提及了教总一直通过各种管道鼓励华裔子弟加入教师行列，并为申请者提供种种的资讯和支援。同时，教总也谴责当局擅自把华小华文组申请者调到国小华文组及中文系毕业生不被录取参加大学毕业生师范课程（KPLI）的面试等问题。因此，教总提出了几项建议，希望能解决华小师资短缺的问题，以免打击这些老师要为教育贡献力量的热诚与理想。
教总难以让同道苟同
无论如何，笔者看了有关文告及数据等发现教总依然十年如一日，文告及呼吁毫无新意，更没为身在华小受苦得的教师申冤，显示教总已经与教师渐行渐远，难以让同道苟同。教总必须谨记教总成立的第一个宗旨为谋求教师的福利，这包括了为教师们争取最好的待遇、给予教师们鼓励、支持教师们为了家庭申请调职、维护教师们的尊严等等。教总并不能只是专注在广招大家加入教育界前的工作而已，反之教总更应该继续帮助在华小面对问题的教育工作者。
很多在籍华小教师在面对问题时，从不会想到教总，而另寻其他管道如教专（NUTP）或其他政党，因为教总在维护在籍教师的权利及权益时往往令人大失所望。这一次，闹得热烘烘的教师周六回校服务的课题，教专就站着教师的立场，劝教师向教专投诉，对付校方。可是，教总主席王超群却不是站在教师的立场，反指出教师们并非每个星期六都需要回校办活动，并说什么家长与教师在星期六见面较方便，显示教总没有坚持教师们休息的权利，不适合再成为全国华小教师的代表。
华小校方刁难教师
教育是良心工作，不是纸张工作，可是教师却把时间浪费在纸张工作，写了一大堆的数据及报告后，却已经身心疲累。教师没有特定的工作时间，挤出应该与家人相聚的时间准备教学后，教师们的假期还要被剥削去参与课程、露营、带队比赛或回到学校补习。
我们华小不只面对教育部招生过程欠缺透明的问题，更不明白华小教师不能被派到自己所要的地方执教，我们华小不像国小，我们处处都缺教师。可是，华小教师就被从北派到南或从南派到北，教育部就是不让华小教师回去，直接打击教师对教育的热诚。奈何，华小校方很少体谅教师，在申请调职时大多不支持，甚至刁难教师；与国小校方支持教师调职相比，华小校方就显得没有协助同道的精神。
教总的领导人是校长
笔者无意抨击教总领导人，但是从教总的常务理事名单中，我们可以知道教总的领导人大部分都是华小的校长。华小的校长在学校是最高领导人，通常都是发下指令让教师执行任务，虽然大家同是公务员，但是校长是上司，教师是下属，所以他们职务立场是对立的。
因此，校长根本不可能维护教师们的权利及权益，相反的还可能压迫及剥削教师的待遇。冰山一角，威南爆发校长体罚教师丑闻后，教总没有放过任何文告，显示出教总必须严禁校长成为理事，以还教总能维护全国华小教师的公信力，毕竟校长们已经有了华小教师职工会的组织平台。
众所周知，以往一些校长在学校买卖作业簿或学校用具等滥权舞弊事件，事情被揭发后只调往其他学校继续做校长的惩罚行动，不止不能阻吓校长，甚至涉嫌包庇他们。很多校长发现惩罚微不足道后，便越来越大胆进行滥权舞弊事件，以致牵涉的校长越来越多，让杏坛蒙羞。教总非但没有监督底下理事或会员，反而默许校长们在买卖作业及收取电脑费时取得回扣，以职权换取额外收入是为贪污，教总为帮凶。
教总应是教师组织
笔者赞扬教总在政策上作出争取，要求政府给予华文小学公平的待遇，同时也长期主办各项华文小学和幼教教师在职培训课程和工作坊。教总也积极推展教育改革的工作，以带领华文教育迎向资讯时代和知识经济时代的需求。这当中，所进行的工作包括主办父母教育课程、巡回教育讲座和研讨会及出 版相关的刊物。
无论如何，教总号称是全马各地区华校教师公会以及州级华校教师公会联合会组成的教师组织，可是发布的统计数据显示教总其实是代表华小的组织而已。身为教师组织，教总理应收集及整理各源流学校教师的级别及薪金（大学资格及非大学资格）以让更多的华小教师能够修读大学文凭或硕士文凭，取得升级及加薪。教总更应该收集申请调职多年都不成功的教师资料，反映予教育部，让华小教师能够回到家乡。此外，着手处理会员们权利及权益之争更是教总的责任。
教总成变相校长职工会
2010年6月8日的教总会员代表大会如果依旧讨论华教的旧课题，实际上并不能为华教带来什么巨大的改变，毕竟这种课题已讨论多次而毫无效果，政府的政策依然故我。在捍卫华教的同时，教总在这次的会员代表大会更应该改革，动议修改章程，拒绝校长成为理事，好让普通的教师们能够拿下责任，成为真正的教师组织。
为了彰显校长们都有维护华教及教育工作者的理想，校长们应该避嫌地离开有利益冲突的理事层，退位让贤。没有改革的教总是另一个校长职工会，这将与教师们渐行渐远，失去其代表性。如果教总一意孤行，笔者大胆建议全国华小教师开始组成的州、区域或县级“华校教师职工会”，最后成立“全国华小教师职工会”以继续争取华小在籍教师的权利及权益。
Tuesday, June 8, 2010
PAKATAN VICTORY IN SIBU
（吉 隆坡8日讯）民联吉兰丹州务大臣聂阿兹表示，回教党绝对不会与巫统结盟，组成联合政府，因为巫统是一个“邪恶”的政权
聂阿兹强调，他从 来不以马来人的角度思考问题，而是以一个穆斯林的角度出发。他说，他不能苟同巫统里面奉行的贪污文化及没有公开招标工程，因为这违反了回教教义。
聂阿兹是昨晚出席民主行动党举办的“诗巫补选民联慰劳宴”时发表上述谈话。出席该场慰劳宴的还包 括：国会反对党领袖拿督斯里安华、行动党国会领袖林吉祥、行动党秘书长兼槟州首席部长林冠英、行动党署理主席陈胜尧、行动党副主席陈国伟、回教党署理主席 纳沙鲁丁、回教党总秘书慕斯达法阿里、公正党副主席阿兹敏阿里等。
林冠英在致词时表 示，诗巫补选是一场艰难的战役，若没有民联三党的紧密合作，是不可能赢下这场选战的，尤其是由三党人员组成的邮寄选票监票人员，更是在这场补选中发挥关键 性的作用，因此民联必须培训更多监票人员，以备战极可能在2012年举行的全国大选。
林 吉祥则指出，黄和联是一个“奇迹议员”，为黄和联创造这奇迹的是倾巢而出的三党领袖与基层。他也表示，从国阵的第十大马计划看得出，马来西亚正处在水深火 热的情况中，如果要拯救马来西亚，就只能依靠民联，而不是国阵。
安华在致词时声称， 诗巫的胜选对民联来说是难能可贵的，因为三党在诗巫不分彼此，共同创造了胜利。他表示，除了三党的合作精神，太多困扰国阵的课题比如说贪污、土地买卖及水 灾也间接让民联获得这场胜利，当地的人民也用选票清楚地表达了他们的心声。
黄 和联：差点需抛银币决胜负
诗巫新任国会议员黄和联在“诗 巫补选民联慰劳宴”表示，若不是有班“监票精兵”在监督邮寄 选票计算的整个过程，他与人联党的刘会耀将极有可能需抛银币决胜负。
他透露，邮寄选 票的废票达到208张，没有归还的选票有190张，加起来就是398张，与他最终获得的多数票398张一样。他说，如果这398张都属于国阵的话，那他与 刘会州将会打成平手，届时将必须靠抛银币来决定谁才是诗巫的国会议员了。
他说，没有 这班“监票精兵”每票必查的精神，他或许当不成诗巫区国会议员。
他强调，正如他胜选 当晚所说的，诗巫的胜利，是迈进柏特拉再也（Petrajaya）的一大步，更是迈向布城（Putrajaya）的超级大步，他坚信民联在下届大选一定做 得到。
聂阿兹强调，他从 来不以马来人的角度思考问题，而是以一个穆斯林的角度出发。他说，他不能苟同巫统里面奉行的贪污文化及没有公开招标工程，因为这违反了回教教义。
聂阿兹是昨晚出席民主行动党举办的“诗巫补选民联慰劳宴”时发表上述谈话。出席该场慰劳宴的还包 括：国会反对党领袖拿督斯里安华、行动党国会领袖林吉祥、行动党秘书长兼槟州首席部长林冠英、行动党署理主席陈胜尧、行动党副主席陈国伟、回教党署理主席 纳沙鲁丁、回教党总秘书慕斯达法阿里、公正党副主席阿兹敏阿里等。
林冠英在致词时表 示，诗巫补选是一场艰难的战役，若没有民联三党的紧密合作，是不可能赢下这场选战的，尤其是由三党人员组成的邮寄选票监票人员，更是在这场补选中发挥关键 性的作用，因此民联必须培训更多监票人员，以备战极可能在2012年举行的全国大选。
林 吉祥则指出，黄和联是一个“奇迹议员”，为黄和联创造这奇迹的是倾巢而出的三党领袖与基层。他也表示，从国阵的第十大马计划看得出，马来西亚正处在水深火 热的情况中，如果要拯救马来西亚，就只能依靠民联，而不是国阵。
安华在致词时声称， 诗巫的胜选对民联来说是难能可贵的，因为三党在诗巫不分彼此，共同创造了胜利。他表示，除了三党的合作精神，太多困扰国阵的课题比如说贪污、土地买卖及水 灾也间接让民联获得这场胜利，当地的人民也用选票清楚地表达了他们的心声。
黄 和联：差点需抛银币决胜负
诗巫新任国会议员黄和联在“诗 巫补选民联慰劳宴”表示，若不是有班“监票精兵”在监督邮寄 选票计算的整个过程，他与人联党的刘会耀将极有可能需抛银币决胜负。
他透露，邮寄选 票的废票达到208张，没有归还的选票有190张，加起来就是398张，与他最终获得的多数票398张一样。他说，如果这398张都属于国阵的话，那他与 刘会州将会打成平手，届时将必须靠抛银币来决定谁才是诗巫的国会议员了。
他说，没有 这班“监票精兵”每票必查的精神，他或许当不成诗巫区国会议员。
他强调，正如他胜选 当晚所说的，诗巫的胜利，是迈进柏特拉再也（Petrajaya）的一大步，更是迈向布城（Putrajaya）的超级大步，他坚信民联在下届大选一定做 得到。
Monday, May 31, 2010
Spending Time with our young children is Love
More often than not we tend to neglect or rather without realising it we simply forgot to spend time with our children due to our hectic schedule or again without realising it, we tend to take things for granted... I must admit being an imperfect person, I do fall into these categories at times too...Reading this article made me stop and ponder for a while...Here's the article for your reading pleasure as well as a gentle reminder ;p
Spending Time with our young children is Love
Practically all parents consider their children as their most important asset. So we send them for additional lessons in music, art, computer, speech and drama, dance, ballet, tennis, etc. We also buy for them expensive toys, computer games, etc. to keep them occupied. We think that by doing so we are giving them a head start in life. But we seldom stop to ask ourselves whether we have equipped them for a life of self-worth and confidence. Why do I say that?
It has been said that by the time a child is seven years old; his attitude is set for life. And when our young child constantly pelts us with his questions, (and we are hard pressed by our furiously competitive jobs) how do we normally respond? Have we stopped and reflected on our attitude towards his insatiable questioning?
Now consider for a moment, a child coming into a room to ask Dad or Mom questions or to invite Mom or Dad to play with him or to request spending time with Dad or Mom, but the parent frequently says, “I’m too busy now.” What does that signal to the child? To the child the message is perceived as. “To Dad, I’m not as important as the newspaper he is reading or the time he spends doing his work at the computer. To Mom, I’m not worth as much as her soap opera on television.”
We forget that children rarely want to spend much time in conversation with their parents. Yes, they ask lots of questions and when they get the answers, they then move on to the next thing that captures their attention. They may sit close a while, perhaps give or receive a hug, and then they are off.
If you are a parent, I would encourage you to make time for your child when your child needs a moment. Most chores can be postponed for a few seconds or minutes. Most activities can be interrupted without you suffering harm or losing out on important information. If you must delay your response to your child for a minute or two, call your child to your side and put your arm around him so that you convey the message, “I want you close to me. I like being with you. I’m not rejecting you, merely delaying my response to your question for a few moments.”
We don’t think of the harm we are doing to their adult life when we fail to give them the time they need. Imagine what it is like whenever we go and talk to our boss and our boss frequently has no time for us. Our confidence will be shattered and our self-worth will plunge drastically. What about the child when we unthinkingly do the same? Have we spent time reflecting on this? Have I unconsciously sent a message to my child that might be summed up, “What I want to do is vastly more important than whatever pain I cause you.” This message will be internalized by the child as “I am not worth being around” “I am not worthy to be appreciated and noticed” and it will show up later in his life as a lack of self-worth.
Parents, who make time to informally tutor their child and not scold them whenever the child asks question, will give the child a very strong sense of self-identity and self-worth. Parents, who read books to their kids, play ball with them when they want you to, read stories they write, watch games they play, hear every recital in which they perform, will give their kids a strong sense of their worth to their parents. They affirm their child. They give their attention to their child. They acknowledge to the child that he is important and worth listening to. The child will have this intuitive sense that, “I am important to my parents. I am so important that they want the very best for me, including the very best education they believe they can give to me. I am so important that they are willing to spend time and energy with me. My parents believe I have the ability to learn and are willing to teach me, and therefore, I must be able to learn well.” A cycle is created: the child is encouraged, the child feels worthy, and the child makes an even bigger effort in learning as a result of the feelings of self-worth. So the child achieves more and learns more. Through his accomplishments and the resulting praises and cheers from the parents, the child has an enhanced feeling of self-worth and the cycle goes round again.
Unfortunately today, we have a mantra that many parents repeat by saying, “I spend quality time with my child and I don’t need quantity time with my child.” They delude themselves! A child instinctively spells your love with the four letters word: T-I-M-E. Not just quality time, but hang-out time, downtime, anytime, all the time. A child, who often does not feel he has access to his parents when he needs the access, does not feel he is loved. He will feel ignored, shunned, insecure and of less worth. Such a child will inevitably have problem with his sense of self-worth later on in life.
The essence of our love for our children is not what we provide for them, but how much TIME we give of ourselves to them. Men, in particular, often don’t understand this. Many have said, “I don’t understand my children. I provide them with everything they need. They don’t appreciate my hard work for them. What more do they want?” They want you! Your ears, your attention, your presence--- Yes your time. “What that must be a joke. Where do I find the time in my stressful life?” you say.
Your most precious gift is your time. Only when you give up your (leisure, computer, game, social, TV, etc) time, do you truly prove your love for your children. Whenever you give your time, you are making a sacrifice, and sacrifice is the essence of love. Thus, you show your love in action and not in words only.
Spending Time with our young children is Love
Practically all parents consider their children as their most important asset. So we send them for additional lessons in music, art, computer, speech and drama, dance, ballet, tennis, etc. We also buy for them expensive toys, computer games, etc. to keep them occupied. We think that by doing so we are giving them a head start in life. But we seldom stop to ask ourselves whether we have equipped them for a life of self-worth and confidence. Why do I say that?
It has been said that by the time a child is seven years old; his attitude is set for life. And when our young child constantly pelts us with his questions, (and we are hard pressed by our furiously competitive jobs) how do we normally respond? Have we stopped and reflected on our attitude towards his insatiable questioning?
Now consider for a moment, a child coming into a room to ask Dad or Mom questions or to invite Mom or Dad to play with him or to request spending time with Dad or Mom, but the parent frequently says, “I’m too busy now.” What does that signal to the child? To the child the message is perceived as. “To Dad, I’m not as important as the newspaper he is reading or the time he spends doing his work at the computer. To Mom, I’m not worth as much as her soap opera on television.”
We forget that children rarely want to spend much time in conversation with their parents. Yes, they ask lots of questions and when they get the answers, they then move on to the next thing that captures their attention. They may sit close a while, perhaps give or receive a hug, and then they are off.
If you are a parent, I would encourage you to make time for your child when your child needs a moment. Most chores can be postponed for a few seconds or minutes. Most activities can be interrupted without you suffering harm or losing out on important information. If you must delay your response to your child for a minute or two, call your child to your side and put your arm around him so that you convey the message, “I want you close to me. I like being with you. I’m not rejecting you, merely delaying my response to your question for a few moments.”
We don’t think of the harm we are doing to their adult life when we fail to give them the time they need. Imagine what it is like whenever we go and talk to our boss and our boss frequently has no time for us. Our confidence will be shattered and our self-worth will plunge drastically. What about the child when we unthinkingly do the same? Have we spent time reflecting on this? Have I unconsciously sent a message to my child that might be summed up, “What I want to do is vastly more important than whatever pain I cause you.” This message will be internalized by the child as “I am not worth being around” “I am not worthy to be appreciated and noticed” and it will show up later in his life as a lack of self-worth.
Parents, who make time to informally tutor their child and not scold them whenever the child asks question, will give the child a very strong sense of self-identity and self-worth. Parents, who read books to their kids, play ball with them when they want you to, read stories they write, watch games they play, hear every recital in which they perform, will give their kids a strong sense of their worth to their parents. They affirm their child. They give their attention to their child. They acknowledge to the child that he is important and worth listening to. The child will have this intuitive sense that, “I am important to my parents. I am so important that they want the very best for me, including the very best education they believe they can give to me. I am so important that they are willing to spend time and energy with me. My parents believe I have the ability to learn and are willing to teach me, and therefore, I must be able to learn well.” A cycle is created: the child is encouraged, the child feels worthy, and the child makes an even bigger effort in learning as a result of the feelings of self-worth. So the child achieves more and learns more. Through his accomplishments and the resulting praises and cheers from the parents, the child has an enhanced feeling of self-worth and the cycle goes round again.
Unfortunately today, we have a mantra that many parents repeat by saying, “I spend quality time with my child and I don’t need quantity time with my child.” They delude themselves! A child instinctively spells your love with the four letters word: T-I-M-E. Not just quality time, but hang-out time, downtime, anytime, all the time. A child, who often does not feel he has access to his parents when he needs the access, does not feel he is loved. He will feel ignored, shunned, insecure and of less worth. Such a child will inevitably have problem with his sense of self-worth later on in life.
The essence of our love for our children is not what we provide for them, but how much TIME we give of ourselves to them. Men, in particular, often don’t understand this. Many have said, “I don’t understand my children. I provide them with everything they need. They don’t appreciate my hard work for them. What more do they want?” They want you! Your ears, your attention, your presence--- Yes your time. “What that must be a joke. Where do I find the time in my stressful life?” you say.
Your most precious gift is your time. Only when you give up your (leisure, computer, game, social, TV, etc) time, do you truly prove your love for your children. Whenever you give your time, you are making a sacrifice, and sacrifice is the essence of love. Thus, you show your love in action and not in words only.
Spending Time with our young children is Love
More often than not we tend to neglect or rather without realising it we simply forgot to spend time with our children due to our hectic schedule or again without realising it, we tend to take things for granted... I must admit being an imperfect person, I do fall into these categories at times too...Reading this article made me stop and ponder for a while...Here's the article for your reading pleasure as well as a gentle reminder ;p
Spending Time with our young children is Love
Practically all parents consider their children as their most important asset. So we send them for additional lessons in music, art, computer, speech and drama, dance, ballet, tennis, etc. We also buy for them expensive toys, computer games, etc. to keep them occupied. We think that by doing so we are giving them a head start in life. But we seldom stop to ask ourselves whether we have equipped them for a life of self-worth and confidence. Why do I say that?
It has been said that by the time a child is seven years old; his attitude is set for life. And when our young child constantly pelts us with his questions, (and we are hard pressed by our furiously competitive jobs) how do we normally respond? Have we stopped and reflected on our attitude towards his insatiable questioning?
Now consider for a moment, a child coming into a room to ask Dad or Mom questions or to invite Mom or Dad to play with him or to request spending time with Dad or Mom, but the parent frequently says, “I’m too busy now.” What does that signal to the child? To the child the message is perceived as. “To Dad, I’m not as important as the newspaper he is reading or the time he spends doing his work at the computer. To Mom, I’m not worth as much as her soap opera on television.”
We forget that children rarely want to spend much time in conversation with their parents. Yes, they ask lots of questions and when they get the answers, they then move on to the next thing that captures their attention. They may sit close a while, perhaps give or receive a hug, and then they are off.
If you are a parent, I would encourage you to make time for your child when your child needs a moment. Most chores can be postponed for a few seconds or minutes. Most activities can be interrupted without you suffering harm or losing out on important information. If you must delay your response to your child for a minute or two, call your child to your side and put your arm around him so that you convey the message, “I want you close to me. I like being with you. I’m not rejecting you, merely delaying my response to your question for a few moments.”
We don’t think of the harm we are doing to their adult life when we fail to give them the time they need. Imagine what it is like whenever we go and talk to our boss and our boss frequently has no time for us. Our confidence will be shattered and our self-worth will plunge drastically. What about the child when we unthinkingly do the same? Have we spent time reflecting on this? Have I unconsciously sent a message to my child that might be summed up, “What I want to do is vastly more important than whatever pain I cause you.” This message will be internalized by the child as “I am not worth being around” “I am not worthy to be appreciated and noticed” and it will show up later in his life as a lack of self-worth.
Parents, who make time to informally tutor their child and not scold them whenever the child asks question, will give the child a very strong sense of self-identity and self-worth. Parents, who read books to their kids, play ball with them when they want you to, read stories they write, watch games they play, hear every recital in which they perform, will give their kids a strong sense of their worth to their parents. They affirm their child. They give their attention to their child. They acknowledge to the child that he is important and worth listening to. The child will have this intuitive sense that, “I am important to my parents. I am so important that they want the very best for me, including the very best education they believe they can give to me. I am so important that they are willing to spend time and energy with me. My parents believe I have the ability to learn and are willing to teach me, and therefore, I must be able to learn well.” A cycle is created: the child is encouraged, the child feels worthy, and the child makes an even bigger effort in learning as a result of the feelings of self-worth. So the child achieves more and learns more. Through his accomplishments and the resulting praises and cheers from the parents, the child has an enhanced feeling of self-worth and the cycle goes round again.
Unfortunately today, we have a mantra that many parents repeat by saying, “I spend quality time with my child and I don’t need quantity time with my child.” They delude themselves! A child instinctively spells your love with the four letters word: T-I-M-E. Not just quality time, but hang-out time, downtime, anytime, all the time. A child, who often does not feel he has access to his parents when he needs the access, does not feel he is loved. He will feel ignored, shunned, insecure and of less worth. Such a child will inevitably have problem with his sense of self-worth later on in life.
The essence of our love for our children is not what we provide for them, but how much TIME we give of ourselves to them. Men, in particular, often don’t understand this. Many have said, “I don’t understand my children. I provide them with everything they need. They don’t appreciate my hard work for them. What more do they want?” They want you! Your ears, your attention, your presence--- Yes your time. “What that must be a joke. Where do I find the time in my stressful life?” you say.
Your most precious gift is your time. Only when you give up your (leisure, computer, game, social, TV, etc) time, do you truly prove your love for your children. Whenever you give your time, you are making a sacrifice, and sacrifice is the essence of love. Thus, you show your love in action and not in words only.
Spending Time with our young children is Love
Practically all parents consider their children as their most important asset. So we send them for additional lessons in music, art, computer, speech and drama, dance, ballet, tennis, etc. We also buy for them expensive toys, computer games, etc. to keep them occupied. We think that by doing so we are giving them a head start in life. But we seldom stop to ask ourselves whether we have equipped them for a life of self-worth and confidence. Why do I say that?
It has been said that by the time a child is seven years old; his attitude is set for life. And when our young child constantly pelts us with his questions, (and we are hard pressed by our furiously competitive jobs) how do we normally respond? Have we stopped and reflected on our attitude towards his insatiable questioning?
Now consider for a moment, a child coming into a room to ask Dad or Mom questions or to invite Mom or Dad to play with him or to request spending time with Dad or Mom, but the parent frequently says, “I’m too busy now.” What does that signal to the child? To the child the message is perceived as. “To Dad, I’m not as important as the newspaper he is reading or the time he spends doing his work at the computer. To Mom, I’m not worth as much as her soap opera on television.”
We forget that children rarely want to spend much time in conversation with their parents. Yes, they ask lots of questions and when they get the answers, they then move on to the next thing that captures their attention. They may sit close a while, perhaps give or receive a hug, and then they are off.
If you are a parent, I would encourage you to make time for your child when your child needs a moment. Most chores can be postponed for a few seconds or minutes. Most activities can be interrupted without you suffering harm or losing out on important information. If you must delay your response to your child for a minute or two, call your child to your side and put your arm around him so that you convey the message, “I want you close to me. I like being with you. I’m not rejecting you, merely delaying my response to your question for a few moments.”
We don’t think of the harm we are doing to their adult life when we fail to give them the time they need. Imagine what it is like whenever we go and talk to our boss and our boss frequently has no time for us. Our confidence will be shattered and our self-worth will plunge drastically. What about the child when we unthinkingly do the same? Have we spent time reflecting on this? Have I unconsciously sent a message to my child that might be summed up, “What I want to do is vastly more important than whatever pain I cause you.” This message will be internalized by the child as “I am not worth being around” “I am not worthy to be appreciated and noticed” and it will show up later in his life as a lack of self-worth.
Parents, who make time to informally tutor their child and not scold them whenever the child asks question, will give the child a very strong sense of self-identity and self-worth. Parents, who read books to their kids, play ball with them when they want you to, read stories they write, watch games they play, hear every recital in which they perform, will give their kids a strong sense of their worth to their parents. They affirm their child. They give their attention to their child. They acknowledge to the child that he is important and worth listening to. The child will have this intuitive sense that, “I am important to my parents. I am so important that they want the very best for me, including the very best education they believe they can give to me. I am so important that they are willing to spend time and energy with me. My parents believe I have the ability to learn and are willing to teach me, and therefore, I must be able to learn well.” A cycle is created: the child is encouraged, the child feels worthy, and the child makes an even bigger effort in learning as a result of the feelings of self-worth. So the child achieves more and learns more. Through his accomplishments and the resulting praises and cheers from the parents, the child has an enhanced feeling of self-worth and the cycle goes round again.
Unfortunately today, we have a mantra that many parents repeat by saying, “I spend quality time with my child and I don’t need quantity time with my child.” They delude themselves! A child instinctively spells your love with the four letters word: T-I-M-E. Not just quality time, but hang-out time, downtime, anytime, all the time. A child, who often does not feel he has access to his parents when he needs the access, does not feel he is loved. He will feel ignored, shunned, insecure and of less worth. Such a child will inevitably have problem with his sense of self-worth later on in life.
The essence of our love for our children is not what we provide for them, but how much TIME we give of ourselves to them. Men, in particular, often don’t understand this. Many have said, “I don’t understand my children. I provide them with everything they need. They don’t appreciate my hard work for them. What more do they want?” They want you! Your ears, your attention, your presence--- Yes your time. “What that must be a joke. Where do I find the time in my stressful life?” you say.
Your most precious gift is your time. Only when you give up your (leisure, computer, game, social, TV, etc) time, do you truly prove your love for your children. Whenever you give your time, you are making a sacrifice, and sacrifice is the essence of love. Thus, you show your love in action and not in words only.
Friday, May 28, 2010
全面探讨公共服务局奖学金
黄翰斌
5月28日
中午 12点11分
又是一年一度公共服务局（JPA）海外奖学金发放的季节。随着越来越多优异生登报、上电视，内阁已同意接管JPA奖学金，并将改名为首相奖学金，接着将检讨奖学金的录取标准及遴选机制，以期达到一个公平和透明化的制度。
其实，JPA奖学金制度不完善，也并不是什么新鲜事。一直以来，奖学金的发放，皆引起大众的诟病，但今年却引起了内阁的注意。这又是为什么呢？
这全因是我国首相纳吉还未稳坐其官椅，众多优异生也因此决定向公共服务局与政府施压，并且希望能够以媒体的力量，上诉得直，一圆出国念书美梦。此外，今年的海外奖学金也将国内政府学院（IPTA）和国内私人学院（IPTS）列入其内，使得众多学生感到货不对版。再加上，高等教育部部长拿督斯里莫哈末卡立，与公共服务局总监丹斯里伊斯迈阿当所证实的遴选准则，互相矛盾，更让普罗民众感到费解。种种原因，让今年的JPA奖学金更具争议性。
然而，笔者想要探讨的，并不是奖学金僧多粥少的窘境，而是遴选制度上的偏差。根据内阁所证实与制定的准则，2000份JPA奖学金里，当中的20%将不分种族，依据绩效制、60%以种族比率分配、10%给东马土著学生和10%保留给弱势学生。这也意即，1676位在SPM考试获得全科A1的优秀生中，只有400位将会被放在同一个平台上竞争。其余的学生，就被分配到剩余的名额里。随着东马土著及种族比率的字眼出现，我们也了解到一个大马的愿景，短期内将难于实现。
从另一个角度来看，以数据趋势来看，考获A1的学生人数也逐年攀升，笔者唯一感到疑惑的是，考获15科或以上A1的学生，是否就真的比考获10、11科A1的学生更为聪明？那400个名额，就真的可以以A1的数目来断定？此外，若根据公共服务局总监的标准来看，遴选方面是以学术、课外活动、双亲收入及面试表现来评估。
众所周知，课外活动的活跃度，自从被纳入各个奖学金及升学申请的其中一个准则后，学生们再也不会因自身的兴趣，而参与；反之，却无可避免的，引进了工商界尔虞我诈、不择手段，以争夺学会或制服团体的最高职位的陋习。这将为学生们带来了一个恶性竞争，除了在课业上拼学业，也极力争取团体高职。况且，由于地理因素，造成每一件中学的教育水平参差不齐，对教育界的各种活动资讯及比赛也因“校”而异，无形中也影响了一些莘莘学子夺得此奖学金的机会。
再说，面试表现，也因为每个面试官的主观印象、个人过往经验和判断力有所不同，再加上，8363位如此庞大的学生人数成功被召去面试，要如何公正不阿地评估每位学生，更挑战了面试表现这项准则的可信度。至于双亲收入，家庭背景等因素，充其量只能作为考量，而不能成为影响奖学金发放的关键因素。公共服务局并不是慈善机构，它旨在协助国家培养未来的栋梁，而不是帮助穷人的福利团体。
若某位学生家境贫穷，但却拥有同等的学习能力，我们更应该给予他这个奖学金。但，若某位学生，没有较为优良的学习能力，却因家境贫穷而获得此奖学金，这就不应该。虽然这样的说法具争议性，但是我们也要了解，外国顶尖大学的入学制度，非常严格。若是医科、牙医系、法律等课程，还需要额外的面试，以争取那少之又少的国际学生名额。若某位学生没有如此高的学习能力，岂不是浪费了国家的资源吗？
笔者在此有两项提议，冀望公共服务局能够参考，以一劳永逸解决这烫手山芋的老问题。
（一）公共服务局应该利用些许时间，查出多年来无法获得本国政府以及私人机构的奖学金，而目前却身处国外顶尖大学求学的大马学生，并承诺将资助他们到顶尖大学继续攻读硕士和博士学位，以培养多方面的人才，增进国家竞争能力之余，也能够减少人才流失的问题。
（二）全面取消此项公共服务局海外奖学金，以成立一个全新的奖学金单位，旨在资助在大马高级考试文凭（STPM）、A 水平等大学预科考获优秀成绩的学生到哈佛、耶鲁、剑桥、帝国学院、澳洲国立大学（ANU）、麻省理工等顶尖大学就读。此举，一来可以省掉资助学生到私人学院就读大学预科的学费，二来也可以让最优秀的学生到国外念书。
5月28日
中午 12点11分
又是一年一度公共服务局（JPA）海外奖学金发放的季节。随着越来越多优异生登报、上电视，内阁已同意接管JPA奖学金，并将改名为首相奖学金，接着将检讨奖学金的录取标准及遴选机制，以期达到一个公平和透明化的制度。
其实，JPA奖学金制度不完善，也并不是什么新鲜事。一直以来，奖学金的发放，皆引起大众的诟病，但今年却引起了内阁的注意。这又是为什么呢？
这全因是我国首相纳吉还未稳坐其官椅，众多优异生也因此决定向公共服务局与政府施压，并且希望能够以媒体的力量，上诉得直，一圆出国念书美梦。此外，今年的海外奖学金也将国内政府学院（IPTA）和国内私人学院（IPTS）列入其内，使得众多学生感到货不对版。再加上，高等教育部部长拿督斯里莫哈末卡立，与公共服务局总监丹斯里伊斯迈阿当所证实的遴选准则，互相矛盾，更让普罗民众感到费解。种种原因，让今年的JPA奖学金更具争议性。
然而，笔者想要探讨的，并不是奖学金僧多粥少的窘境，而是遴选制度上的偏差。根据内阁所证实与制定的准则，2000份JPA奖学金里，当中的20%将不分种族，依据绩效制、60%以种族比率分配、10%给东马土著学生和10%保留给弱势学生。这也意即，1676位在SPM考试获得全科A1的优秀生中，只有400位将会被放在同一个平台上竞争。其余的学生，就被分配到剩余的名额里。随着东马土著及种族比率的字眼出现，我们也了解到一个大马的愿景，短期内将难于实现。
从另一个角度来看，以数据趋势来看，考获A1的学生人数也逐年攀升，笔者唯一感到疑惑的是，考获15科或以上A1的学生，是否就真的比考获10、11科A1的学生更为聪明？那400个名额，就真的可以以A1的数目来断定？此外，若根据公共服务局总监的标准来看，遴选方面是以学术、课外活动、双亲收入及面试表现来评估。
众所周知，课外活动的活跃度，自从被纳入各个奖学金及升学申请的其中一个准则后，学生们再也不会因自身的兴趣，而参与；反之，却无可避免的，引进了工商界尔虞我诈、不择手段，以争夺学会或制服团体的最高职位的陋习。这将为学生们带来了一个恶性竞争，除了在课业上拼学业，也极力争取团体高职。况且，由于地理因素，造成每一件中学的教育水平参差不齐，对教育界的各种活动资讯及比赛也因“校”而异，无形中也影响了一些莘莘学子夺得此奖学金的机会。
再说，面试表现，也因为每个面试官的主观印象、个人过往经验和判断力有所不同，再加上，8363位如此庞大的学生人数成功被召去面试，要如何公正不阿地评估每位学生，更挑战了面试表现这项准则的可信度。至于双亲收入，家庭背景等因素，充其量只能作为考量，而不能成为影响奖学金发放的关键因素。公共服务局并不是慈善机构，它旨在协助国家培养未来的栋梁，而不是帮助穷人的福利团体。
若某位学生家境贫穷，但却拥有同等的学习能力，我们更应该给予他这个奖学金。但，若某位学生，没有较为优良的学习能力，却因家境贫穷而获得此奖学金，这就不应该。虽然这样的说法具争议性，但是我们也要了解，外国顶尖大学的入学制度，非常严格。若是医科、牙医系、法律等课程，还需要额外的面试，以争取那少之又少的国际学生名额。若某位学生没有如此高的学习能力，岂不是浪费了国家的资源吗？
笔者在此有两项提议，冀望公共服务局能够参考，以一劳永逸解决这烫手山芋的老问题。
（一）公共服务局应该利用些许时间，查出多年来无法获得本国政府以及私人机构的奖学金，而目前却身处国外顶尖大学求学的大马学生，并承诺将资助他们到顶尖大学继续攻读硕士和博士学位，以培养多方面的人才，增进国家竞争能力之余，也能够减少人才流失的问题。
（二）全面取消此项公共服务局海外奖学金，以成立一个全新的奖学金单位，旨在资助在大马高级考试文凭（STPM）、A 水平等大学预科考获优秀成绩的学生到哈佛、耶鲁、剑桥、帝国学院、澳洲国立大学（ANU）、麻省理工等顶尖大学就读。此举，一来可以省掉资助学生到私人学院就读大学预科的学费，二来也可以让最优秀的学生到国外念书。
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